a sphinx girl who’s absolute balls at riddles but fucking loves terrible puns
a traveler is blocked by a sphinx suddenly while going along a path. “what do bees brush their hair with?” she asks, and he’s FREAKING OUT, he’s going to get fucking eaten, didn’t the sphinx DIE, oh god what was the riddle, he knows this one oh shit he knows this one what was it, oh fuck, what the fuck
the sphinx narrows her eyes and bares her teeth a little. oh shit, the traveler thinks, oh shit he’s fucking dead.
the sphinx grins like a goddamn doofus and struggles to hold back laughter as she answers “a honeycomb”
I don’t know if I always manage to succeed in portraying kismesissitude with as much nuance as I want to, but it irks me when people don’t realize there has to be a rivalry over something, whether it’s physical or over hacking or FLARPing or whatever. It’s all about seeing someone who’s not living up to their true potential and hating their guts for being such a slacker. So you poke and prod and establish this rivalry to make them work towards being better, and in the process you improve yourself too. It’s a win-win situation for a troll.
There’s actually a good deal of care and concern at the root of a black relationship. You have to like this person enough that you don’t want the drones to cull them, so you’re going to establish this rivalry and make them strong and fill a bucket with them so they’re basically uncullable.
Rough sex is probably pretty par for the course considering all that pent-up hatred and aggression and resentment, but rough sex is not the same thing as BDSM, and I could definitely see gentler sex occurring within a kismesissitude—either as a way to tease and taunt your partner, or as an actual act of respect with an injured partner.
I headcanon that if someone sees their kismesis hurt seriously they are probably gonna be pissed and destroy whatever did it, and then take care of their kismesis in a pseudo-pale or red fashion and nurse them back to health. A weak kismesis does nobody any favors. Having a weak kismesis implies that you’re weak, because it’s all you could handle, so if yours gets hurt, you take care of them gently at first and then push them back to what they were before. If you just dump them when that shit happens, all it does is announce that you’re a jackass that didn’t really care about keeping their kismesis from getting culled in the first place, and that you’re too fail to nurse them back to health. How your black quadrant holds up would affect your public image quite a bit.
I mentioned this once in Desiderata, but I really do see bondage specifically being a high-end honour in a redrom relationship, not to mention exceptionally kinky. No matter how light it is, one mate is placing explicit trust in the other, rendering themselves vulnerable in a way that goes against everything their culture makes them become, and do so voluntarily. It’s the ultimate act of unmitigated faith—and I think that would be kinky as all hell given how troll society works.
^^^ I agree with grimreaperchibi on the bondage thing. There’s some serious trust and vulnerability required for BDSM, neither of which are exactly commonly accepted in troll society. It would be quite the red kink.
Seconding this because I was gonna post with something similar but then I got distracted, haha. BDSM is based in mutual respect but also mutual trust and communication with one partner purposefully placing themselves in a position of submission. Red all the way.
“God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players [i.e. everybody], to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won’t tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time.”—From “Good Omens” by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman (via derek-von-evil)
trollstuck aus are the best we need more trollstuck aus
i love humanstuck aus as much as the next person but gosh troll culture is so cool we need to collectively stop worrying about forgetting details or messing up what lowbloods call furniture and boldly go forth where few have gone before
1. Stop faking your fucking orgasms. Society already tells young men that they run the fucking universe - if they can’t turn your cunt into a shooting star then for god’s sake, let them know about it.
2. Once you’ve stopped faking your fucking orgasms, use this newfound honesty throughout the rest of your life - stop ordering coffee you don’t actually like; stop sitting at a desk and allowing people to treat you like shit in the hopes that a meek attitude will earn you a promotion (it won’t); stop telling people they can finish your food when you’re not actually done yet. These may seem petty, but they add up, just like every orgasm you didn’t actually get to have.
3. If you wanna dance all night, dance all fucking night. Dance all night even if you have work in the morning. The worst that will happen is you’ll drink RedBull all day and look like a zombie - pass it off as a head cold to the real zombies you work with and flick through the embarrassing photos you’re being tagged in as you pretend to take a shit for some peace and quiet. I promise, you’ll remember dancing all night in ten years, not the suspicious way your boss looked at you that morning.
4. If your ass looks big in that, that’s a good thing.
5. You will never be as young as you are this second. Embrace it.
6. Embrace the fact that you’re going to get older. Ask your boyfriend if he will still love you when you’re seventy and your tits are down to your knees. Look forward to this time - seventy year old women are allowed to do pretty much whatever they want, and no-one can stop them. You can carry candy in your bag and not share it with a single soul. You can stay home all day and cross-stitch expletives onto handkerchiefs for your grandchildren and slip them under the table out of sight of the people you raised. You can drink whisky at 10am. Every phase of your life is going to be amazing for different reasons. Embrace that.
7. A lot of people will pretend to love Bukowski. Don’t pretend to love Bukowski if you don’t love Bukowski. It’s overplayed and no-one will mind if you actually like Virginia Andrews instead - the people who do mind are boring.
”—Some more little life lessons, by Daisy Lola. (via bodypartss)